Going home.

I love UVA. I really do. For someone with so much "buyer's remorse", I'm surprised that I am not at least a little "remorseful" about my college decision. With so much certainty and consistency in my choice, and my feelings on it, this honestly has to be part of God's plan. That might sound a little corny and a bit cliche, but I am confident in my convictions to be able to say that. God lead me here to meet certain people, face certain obstacles, form a new family, struggle, and persevere. I already wrote in great detail about the incredible and awesome people--awesome family--that I've met here, so there's not much to elaborate on there. So all I have to say is this: I love UVA.

Our president for GCF was talking last Sunday at Chapel, and told us all how UVA was his real home, and how NOVA now felt like his home away from home. Maybe that's cause of whatever his past was like, or maybe it's just the virtue of having been away from home at college for 4 years, but for whatever reason, UVA is his home.

I can't say this yet.

UVA is definitely a home away from home--a place that I have found amazing comfort in. But it is still not my first home (not yet, at least?). I realized all this when I went back spur of the moment about two weeks ago. I found out one Wednesday evening that some of my friends were going home on the weekend, and I had a spontaneous desire to go home with them. And though it was random, it was a revealing experience.

In the other previous times when I went home, I always was ready to go back to college. Being home was good and relaxing, but I felt like I needed to be at UVA; I needed to be plugged back in. But now that everything has settled down, now that routines are set it and things are almost too familiar now, in that moment of going home, I realized: I miss it. I miss my home. My family, my hometown. I miss suburbia, my neighborhood. My friends, my first second family. Who knew?

That short weekend was not enough. It felt so good to just relax like how I used to. But when Sunday came, it was time to go home. It wasn't bad though. Once I got back to UVA, things fell right back into rhythm. It must be a college phenomenon: when I'm at UVA, I am not homesick. But when it nears time go to home, I could not be more excited.

I really miss my family though. There's no reason or need to explain that though. I just miss them. I'm pretty glad that UVA is not that far away though, and that I have the opportunity to just go home on a random weekend. But I am looking forward to spending time with them this break, as weird as that might sound.

I think there is some need for explanation on this next part though. Past conversations and situations has led me to realize just how much I miss some people back at home. I miss my brother, one of my best friends. No homo or anything, but I love this guy. Things with him don't usually make sense, so I guess I shouldn't be too surprised that we still talk and stuff. But honestly I really am. There are very, very few people that I still keep in contact with from high school and stuff. It shouldn't make sense that we're still close and whatnot, that I still know we're there for each other. But the random drop-in call to say hi or to rage about some stupid school assignment, or for still valuing my opinion on more serious matters, show me that nothing's changed. Yo we're gonna be brothers for life, even if you don't transfer into UVA. It's only been one semester, but really that's enough time for any friendship to fall apart. I got your back chigg. 사랑해.


I miss my best friend since 6th grade. Even though I barely saw her growing up (LOL like I'm dong "growing up"), knowing that I'm going home makes me miss her even more. I know that we never had a lot of chances to chill and stuff, at least not as much as I would've wanted, so infrequently seeing her over break isn't that different from before. But it's different, because now breaks are the only time we have to meet up. SO LET'S MEET UP!!!!!!!!!!!

And of course there is the neighbor that I have to see. Not just my food provider or my ride giver, but the sister I can't get rid of. LOL JOKE LANG! Seriously, we've gone through a lot of crap with each other, so there's no worry for me in my mind either. I know, even without you saying, that we're both freaking busy this thanksgiving break. So if we can't meet up, even for a little bit, this break, I will definitely see your face over Christmas. Don't have any more meltdowns, but if you do, even if it doesn't seem like it, I'm always available for that. Don't forget that. <3

Aigoo...I really want to go home. I want to see these people. I want to eat spaghetti...omg....I miss my mom's food. I have never appreciated home cooked meals as much as I do now. MOM AND DAD I'M COMING SOON!!! (And you too Ericka).

get ready to do my laundry >:D